Monday, October 20, 2014

Has it really been 10 years?

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Do you remember the very last time I saw you in this life over ten years ago? I do. Today, I tried to keep the memories at bay until I got home from work and could enjoy them to the fullest, but it didn’t work out that way. I was on my way back to work, on my lunch break, when for some reason Cold Stone jumped into my head, which then triggered my very last precious memory of you.

You asked me to come down to your little white house on the William’s farm and babysit the Buddy boy while you took Cathy out on a date. And of course I did, because Bubby is my guy, so full of love and life, just like you. You didn’t get home until nearly 11pm, Braden was already asleep and I was watching TV. You came in with a half eaten cup of Cold Stone ice cream and asked me if I wanted the rest. “REALLY?! You’re giving me your ice cream?!” I was shocked, because I know how much you love good food. Then came an even more shocking thing, you talked to me like a person…like a friend, instead of your little sister. You listened. I loved it. It meant so much to me. Then you and Cathy gave me hugs and thanked me again for babysitting. That was the last hug I got to give you in this life. I cherish it. I look forward to our next hug.

Tonight, Denis being so kind and wonderful, knew that today, like every year, is always a more emotional day for me. And so he asked me if he could take me to get some ice cream. There is a Cold Stone within walking distance, we enjoyed sharing a cup together while I shared memories of you with Denis. He listened, asked questions, and gave me hugs in all the right moments. Tonight, I miss you John. Like crazy and it’s wonderful because I get to remember all the awesome things about you and I get to look forward to when I will see you again. Of course my heart aches today, but I wouldn’t change that for the world. I love you forever and ever <3